Quarter Year

The problem of time

In recent conversations with friends I’ve been paying attention to the dance of head- and heart-centered expression.

I’ve always thought of myself as a good listener, and I think I am, but I’ve noticed there’s one question I often ask that knocks people out of “speaking from the heart” and into the head. The question is some form of, “When was that?”
It’s innocent enough, it’s a question for me to get a grip on the chronology of what was going on in someone’s life. But usually it’s not worth derailing the momentum of heart-centered talk.

Similarly, there’s an issue with meditation that I needed to resolve. I’ve always made an effort to “be in the present moment” or as I’ve recently been trying, “be sensitive to the present moment.” The problem here is that in framing it as a matter of time (“moment”) I was paying attention to the linear aspect of my experience, which had a tendency to override the non-linear aspects. In other words, by giving importance to the idea that I was experiencing an aspect of time, I was derailing the experience of place. I was trying to feel with my head. It’s simply impossible. Feeling is the heart’s domain, and I mean this literally, not metaphorically.

The meditation language I’m beginning to use is more along the lines of, “My purpose is to be a feeling being.” I like that this trains me to see my identity as heart-centered.

I’m sure in two days I’ll find something wrong with that sentence, but I’m making progress.

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